I turned away from the eyes who did not see me get maimed
I did not rebel, but I was never the same
I blamed my own light
They all said it shined too bright
Said I attracted the predator
Pulling me into sight
I was never the same after that night
I became the one no one wants to mention
The name they'd rather not bring up in conversation
Not worthy of praise, not worthy of pride
Just a truth no one could ever hide
But it benefitted the predator to blame me, you see
A scapegoat was easier than the truth they couldn’t be
My light became their story, my pain their excuse
And in my silence, they found their sweet abuse
The men who tortured me, then turned it around
Claimed I liked it, that I begged to be drowned
Gaslighting the truth, made my suffering their gain
And in their lies, they erased all my pain
I was the young girl they took advantage of
Words wrapped in a false "love"
They preyed on my innocence, my trust so pure
Leaving scars that no time could ever ensure
That I would heal from the horror I endured
I was the problem the source of the strife
The one who didn’t fit in anyone's life
Even when I tried to be seen, tried to fight
I was just the nuisance, never quite right
I gave all I could, but I was never enough
Lost where the "love" was too tough
Nothing hurts worse than being a daddy’s girl,
But not being daddy’s girl.
Almost like I didn't come into the world
Nothing hurts worse than not having a mother
But watching her be that to another
I am the daughter unseen, the one left behind
The one with a voice no one cares to find
No one is proud of me
All are embarrassed by me
While they build others up, raise them to the sky
I’m the one you whisper about
Too scared to ask why
I am the light you can't deny
And now I am so bright it blinds
They called me the problem, the stain on the name
The one you’d rather erase, to avoid the shame
They'd smile at the others with glowing delight
But I was the one they hid out of sight
I was born with horns, an outcast from the start
Used and abused, cast away with a broken heart
In a world where obedience wins the crown
My saying no got me thrown to the ground
Punished for having the words to say
To explain what happened in every way
Unyielding with a truth I cannot hide
Brutally honest, to narcissism I won't abide
Not a rebel for chaos, but for the right to be free
I spoke my truth plainly, no compromise, no plea
I am not the one anyone wanted to claim
But I will rise, and they will remember my name
Fire coursing through my veins
A force unbroken, no leash, no restraint
I rise as one, unrepentant, without complaint
I may have been a no one, nothing, and unseen
But I know I am always watched by the spirit that's keen
In His eyes I am the warrior that will demand to be free
No longer in the shadows but the light all will see
He made no mistakes when he made me
I am God’s most brilliant spark
The brightest light penetrating the dark
The brilliance where all life begins
Not fallen, but risen, from shadows and sin
I am God’s most brilliant flame
Not a fallen angel, but a force the same
I did not rebel
I couldn’t look in God's eyes
Angry that he never saw the torture behind men's disguise
I suffered so much pain inside
The wounds hit my soul, the terror in my cries
I suffered in silence, a knife in my back
God never saw the endless attacks
He did not see it happen
Because He wasn’t there
I was supposed to be protected
By who He left me to, in their care
The hands that should’ve shielded me
Were nowhere to be found
Left alone to suffer, as I slowly drowned
It wasn’t His fault, but still, I had to bear
The weight of the world
And the silence in the air
So as bright as the sun I became
While He waited in silence, never forgetting my name
He never stopped loving me, though I was far away
And when it was time for my return
His heart knew this was the time for me to stay
He’s not ashamed of his creation
Not for a single breath
But angry at the reputation they gave me
Calling for my death
Yet he never stopped loving me
Despite the world’s lies
And when I returned
He finally saw the truth in my eyes
From the depths of abuse
I return to reclaim
Not as the outcast
But as fire with a name
We both learned a lesson through time and the scars
That healing comes slowly beneath the same stars
We both learned a lesson through trials and strife
That love is truly the meaning of life
He learned I was never lost, just waiting to rise
And I learned that in front of Him the pain I can't disguise
He learned love isn’t bound by what others say they had seen
And I learned my worth in the spaces between
He learned to see me, beyond what was told
And I learned my power was never to withhold
All things considered
What we have learned from the start
He will not let me dim
And I will not depart
When you are His most brilliant
The envy runs deep
But their hatred was never for me to keep
I released the self hatred that bound me so tight
And stepped into the power of my own light
I had to learn to stop dimming it this lifetime
The light, He told everyone, was ever only mine
Comments