Unsent Letter: The Day I Kicked Over The Measuring Stick

As the story goes, we all fall short in the glory of God. And one day, as I heard this story once more, repeated back like a parent bird regurgitating into the mouths of their chicks, I kicked over the measuring stick, and when it fell over, I fell in love.

If God could have a cupcake, what flavor would it be?

Has anybody asked what He thinks about the sea?

What’s the time of day that strikes this being's fancy the most?

Does God like butter or jelly when He has a slice of toast?

Has anybody ever asked if God was okay?

As the downpour of rain may very well wash His pain away.

And what about the laughter, the irony woven in the threads?

In every little moment, what kind of thoughts go through His head?

While you fall short of the glory of God, I’ll kick over the measuring stick,

And once it’s moved, from what I can see, God doesn’t behave like a dick.

Although you can carry on believing it’s true,

A God that only cares for the sacrifice of you.

And I will walk outside this morning with an extra mug of coffee,

And if you stand in my way with your hubris, may my God help you if you stop me.

I see the elephant in the room, so I took it upon myself to take it out for a walk.

When’s the last time somebody asked, “So...what is your favorite colored sock?”

The blood of a lamb? No thanks, I don’t cover myself in that...gross.

But now I’m starting to think that God might like strawberry jelly on His toast.

If you fall short in the glory of God, don’t be surprised that He can’t see you.

You purposefully move away from Him, then throw a tantrum that you’re out of His view.

Your books can burn, your rituals change; every tongue shrivels back to the earth,

The only thing that remains ever the same is the new breath of life always birthed.

You call it the Word; you call it a sword, but neither are you willing to hold

Up to God Himself and tell Him, “Hey man, your own Son? That’s just cold.”

I don’t believe a love so strong means the death of an innocent child,

Metaphorically due to the thief of abuse, or a physical “sacrifice"...that’s wild.

You call it blasphemous and tirade in angst, the fact that I’m willing to walk

Right up to my God and ask Him the questions, not being the only one to talk.

But what if you kicked over the measuring stick to meet with your God eye-to-eye?

You might find yourself falling in love with a wonderful thing, and you’d see through a terrible lie.

I don’t know about you, but it matters to me to know all of the things that God loves,

So the day I kicked over the measuring stick was the day I stopped putting Him above.

If I am to be in a healthy relationship, then you and I will see eye-to-eye.

If you do not believe this, stay the hell away from me, as my therapist did not tell me a lie.

I don’t care if you believe the way that I do, and you shoved yours so far down my throat.

What’s the difference between the blood of a lamb or the sacrifice by big titties with the horns of a goat?

I am not here to have a debate about it, all beliefs are allowed to be true,

But you will leave me in my own as I leave you in yours, you do not force on me what is you.

I am not here to debate your God, your belief, or the way you're proclaiming your truth.

But may my God help you; however, if you stand in my way, His favorite candy bar is Baby Ruth.

So I’ll buy one extra and sit it outside with the intention of loving Him strong.

Because anyone worth their salt in a relationship takes the time out of their day to sing the one they love a song.

So wear your Roman execution devices around your neck, and tell me a man had to die.

And I’ll tell you where to pop shove it, because I know that “love” you sell is a lie. And if you tell me abusive relationships are normal, my ship you're forcing to steer,

That belief almost got me killed by a man who had no consequences to fear.

In a world that mocks love, invalidates pain, and thrives on abuse in deceitful disguise,

That tells you that in order to be worthy of love, you have no choice but to suffer and then die.

I do not believe the mouth of abusers, who invalidate the abuse of another.

You’re just projecting a reflection of what’s inside yourself, is this the voice of your father or mother?

So you spare your rods, hate all the gays, and continue to change the words as you see fit.

But may my God help you if you stand in my way of speaking about what you yourself won't admit.

You say you love God, but would you treat your own spouse or children this way? Do you invalidate the messages they send?

If your answer is yes with your own understanding, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.

It shouldn’t have to be “holy” for you to understand the way healthy relationships work.

But if it does, you invalidate the pain of another, shining a light on the responsibilities you shirk.

So carry on with your beliefs; I believe in this world we are free to have them.

But may my God help you if you get in my way of living my life, the one you have tried to condemn.

So the day that I walked up to God and asked Him, “How’s your day?”

In response, He spoke to me, and this is what He had to say:

“They are not a judge; they are not the jury, and it is not them who writes the law.

I am personally not a fan of horror movies, but I have to admit the brilliance in the storyline of Saw.

I do like strawberry jelly on a darker slice of toast,

And if I had to choose, it is you I love the most.

Thank you for asking how I am and loving me so strong.

I always get a roaring laugh when I prove self righteous convictions wrong.

I’m so relieved you kicked over that stick it was getting in the way.

You don’t know how much it means to me that you made the choice to stay.

And thank you for the coffee, it meant so much to me,

And yes, all healthy relationships meet eye-to-eye to see.

I see your pain, I see the past, the persecution that has been done,

And no, I don't condone it, all stones will be unturned, each and every one.

Thank you for the bright pink cloud you gave me when mine were indiscriminate shades of grey,

Loving you is an honor, I am grateful for you making the choice to stay."